Евгений Юрьевич Клейменов
Dream. If you fall into insanity, you will get another name
© Evgeny Kleymenov, 2018
ISBN 978-5-4490-6349-6
Created with Ridero smart publishing system
SLEEP 1
“The God has very different plans for people, and is it a sin?…
They are people who like labels.”
Can you imagine what Gods say in paradise about people? I bet on the black one, red one, white one, bet on a pimply man, a bearded manor that crowd of people that are trying to become happy. Like, their dreams might come true and they will survive in this world for more than a dozen years and go to the paradise. May their hearts be open and may their relations and thoughts be serene. May they remain honest and trustful, and should they taste the betrayal, may they be able to recognize this and to earn forgiveness. Otherwise they will become cold-hearted and go straight to hell.
That’s the Gods’ way to spend the evenings in the paradise, they just play out people’s lives, killing a boredom making people’s life meaningful. The paradox of such a world in that someone is reverent because of someone’s boredom – mostly the God’s.
Some Gods have never been playing. They have taken care of their wards with all their might, which eventually led to loss of their personality – the gods became their protégés. After that they are usually sent down to earth in human bodies, so that they could live life and don’t think about it any more. And their protégés should be destroyed, for two identical particles can’t live in this world. This disease is called “A love to mankind”, after such a journey the Gods begin to play immediately, no one ever again does the same thing. What’s worse, don’tall were able to return, for to return from the human everydayness is too much. If someone should not return, he will be being forgotten, and his name is erased from signs “Gods of Paradise”, and no one talking about him any more.
Gods in people’s bodies are always different from regular people by their superhuman abilities. No one will be sent to Earth without a cover. The covers are the Angels who helpe these Gods return to the paradise. And proceed to their immediate duties. They do this in many ways: they are Gods in demons, angels or ordinary people who deprive them of the sense of living on Earth. They helped to live this human life as quickly as possible. For the Angels, this is also difficult. Some of they are so cared for so long that they forgot themselves and reincarnated in uncontrollable demons who tortured all – Gods and everyone who played for a long time in the human games, not remained the same.
Earth for the Gods is like a psychiatric hospital for people, where you can think what you want, and to do whatever you want to as long as you don’tcaught and not stuffed with drugs that intoxicate your mind, blocking your consciousness. After you stop taking medication, your madness breaks out thousands of times faster than it was before. None wants to live in cell, even this cell of psychotherapeutic drugs. Why does the attitude of the Gods to the people have change after the journey? Sometimes they begin to despise them. No, the Gods never ceased to be care for them, but now they became more legible and paid less attention to their whims. “The gods are crying, the world is drowning in sorrow”. Since now the Gods are gods to rule people, and not run around with them with their love and stupid problems. As He said: “Everyone should know his limits and not get confused, don’tlose oneself. “This truth everyone followed, everyone try to know his limits and mind his business. It’s easier for people to live, they live in ignorance, they are His favorites, are entitled to forgiveness, and the Gods themselves forgive them, without any of His instructions. People can mistake, but the Gods can’t.
***
– Do you remember what were you dreaming about? I think I don’t… I remember, I remember everything that was there, and I lived it as if an electrical discharge has passed through me, touching my soul. The feelings still overflow me, I was in your dream… Your memories are taken away to you, there are so many worth remembering things. Everybody doesn’t need to know everything. But I remember and I know, I see all this as now. – the narrator smiled sadly and continued. – Those who know make mistakes very often, even lose interest. When we were children, we received surprises from Ded Moroz. What gift will they give us, what will be there, will our desires be fulfilled?..
Bright shining eyes looked under the tree, we with impatiently raked tinsel to get our gift. And many people did. Knowledge is not there is always strength, to some knowledge we just don’tready. This is called “monkey with grenade”. Failure to understand the information they were given. We have the knowledge and force which we couldn’t cope.
– I don’t understand what you are talking about. – the girl confusingly looked around.
They stood on wharf railing, and I was as if other people didn’t exist. The sky was gray, filled with leaden clouds, the sea was dark blue, the waves were breaking the sea, and the foam creating beautiful, gloomy colors. All this made the girl depressed.
– It’s simple. Now I wish that the dream became a reality. I have to decide if I should tell you what was there, or not. This is a very responsible mission, from it all depends on what is happening.
– So what was it? Are you telling me your vulgarity?
– No, everything was wonderful there, – Arthur looked up at the sky seemed to revel in this memory. – Autumn morning, the fog is descending from mountains, the sun is shining through the fog. I am looking at you – you are all pure beauty. You are standing at coast and you are looking in my eyes… Hah, here you just look. Everything was different there. You looked in my eyes with my heart, not hiding from me. You gave yourself completely to me, opened like a flower, a wonderful morning flower, a lily bud.
He grinned, went to dense banisters and then continued seriously:
– I know how much you love the sea, how much you love the sea wind … – He shuddered. – Well and I don’tlike to endure it. I’m shivering. How can you be so dry and love the sea?
– “How can you be so dry and love the sea? “Are you telling me this? – Natalie looked away and lost eyes in sea.
– Of course, your drought is not can even conquer the sea. They say the opposites attract. Well, and I believe that all this is nonsense. I’m attracked to don’tyou from great love for you, and because I love when I’m tormented. Yes… I’ve chosen you! Alas, it was not at your strength, to prevent this. You have repeatedly denied your knights, but when you fell in love, threw you, as you call it – “betrayed”. And here you decided that people don’tlove, and is not so, silly princess…
Arthur came over from behind and whispered over her ear:
– That’s you who can’t love…
Her look is not changed, only her eyes ran over to the sea.
– All this is not your mask, it’s there is you… I noticed this recently, I blindly believed you, my decision to be with you appeared somehow at once, even at our first meeting. And I don’t deny it. But you’re a fucking princess! You needed knight fights, exploits… What is this feats, you and not knew. All your men have gone through this, – Arthur stood in front of her, she was looking at the sea clinging to railings.
– You are a doll, you don’thave emotions, you are all made of templates. When this is understood by your chosen one, he leaves, and you’re just starting to fall in love… And again: “I should hide under the mask!”, “Men don’table to love! “… It’s simple! They don’t know your mask hides you, no one wants to love an emotionless doll! You are this doll!
He got out and turned his back. The girl turned, raised and said.
– After all, you love me…
– I love you! – The guy laughed and continued shouting: – I don’tlove you! I love people like you! “There are hundreds of you, – he continued calmly, that I give myself away to you, to one and only. I’m not clean, I want to revive you, breathe at least a little emotion in your empty life. You hide under the guise of indifference, but eventually, turn into a an indifferent doll. Then it’s too late to run and scream: “I love life and its pleasures.”
Arthur turned to Natalie and looked straight at her eyes.
– It’s not everything, Natalie… I’ll tell you to love and never give up. My act is not surrender, this is the plan of victory. I left several messages for you, so in general, you know what you need to do. Live life to the fullest, in love…
Arthur pulled out a gun and put the trunk to his temple. Shot, the body falls on deck, Arthur lies in the spreading a halo of his blood… The berth was filled with panic, but Natalie doesn’t hear, everything sounds like a dream, the sounds are muffled.
She fell on knees, and at her eyes, where the halo of Art’s blood was reflected, there was only the sea, a sea of tears.
SLEEP 2
– Are you sure that you should go to the funeral? – Xenia looked empathically at sad Natalie.
– I have to go, it’s my duty for a friend. – eyes looked around, in nowhere, her thoughts were not here.
– Can you stand it? I know that you are strong and you won’t break, but… Look in my eyes and say: “I will manage”.
She approached – Natalie and looked directly at her in eyes.
– I can handle! – her words sounded confident.
***
Not many people attended the funeral, Arthur admitted to only interesting people. His relatives stood in side, people came up and expressed their condolences.
A young man stood beside Natalie. He smelled this same sweet perfume, like Arthur. He wore a large hood, his face couldn’t be seen. You could see the malicious smile that plunged Natalie into perplexity and a little angry.
– Do you think it’s funny? – she reproached the guy.
– Sorry, he was just my friend, although we not were well acquainted.
The guy looked Natalie right in eyes, she shuddered. She still couldn’t see his face.
– Between us like an eternity, and As if we are one… Not I even know how Explain…
The guy turned away and was buried into themeditations, not arranging.
– I’m Natalie, – the girl held out her hand.
The stranger answered with an indifferent handshake, staying in his meditations, not telling his name.
– He asked me … – he said slowly, as if recalling what asked him Arthur about.
– Asked than?
Her words returned the guy to reality.
– Excuse me…
The guy headed towards exit from cemeteries.
Natalie watched him go, completely confused. About what did Arthur ask him? The people on the cemetery were looking at Natalie. She didn’t have time to think about this guy, she cringed and put her hands in pockets coat. There she felt a piece of paper. She reached and unfolded, seeing Arthur’s handwriting.
It said: “Everything turned out very tragically, in my style. Now you have to clear up my deed. We are bound by my death and your happiness. I planned all this for one week to my ascension. The price to tell you this is so high, I’m sorry. I acted like a bastard, but this outcome was the best. Not pay attention to people’s views, do what you always wanted, don’tdwell on my death. And it’s not worth living in this small town, you are not endure this…
My death laid the foundation for your happiness.”
***
Natalie glanced at exit from cemetery, but that guy disappeared, she wanted to escape, she was stopped by Xenia, who came to her.
– Are you OK? – Xenia’s voice returned to Natalie to the reality.
– No, I’m not OK. Arthur is right, I’m gone, – she looked into the distance, in the distance of the desert, where the clouds were already gathering. The girl’s eyes filled with tears.
– It is decided that there will be a sea here, – Natalie said with a grin.
How often do we hear the words: “Don’t go away, I need you”, ” I won’t live without you,”, ” I love you.”? And how much do they cost when we say them?. All this world depends on friend, on the moment and consequences of this relationship…
A we leave and only sometimes we think to return, when nothing can be returned.