Shuli Zhao
Sanjay
Villagers noticed Sanjay’s children had new clothes and Damayanti didn’t borrow rice, so they concluded that Sanjay must steal something expensive. Those who lost domestic animals or money all suspected him. In the first lunar month, Vasin received a rich man’s obituary, so he went to the town to offer his condolence. He found Sanjay was one of the two buglers who performed to see visitors out at the end of the fu-
neral. Sanjay also saw him and then turned face.
Sanjay earned some money in the funeral. He thought he did noth- ing wrong, but Vasin didn’t think so.
At night, Vasin summoned his relatives and told them, “Sanjay is such a bad guy. He works as bugler in the town and plays in the funeral. As a member of our family, he is losing our face. Others will misun- derstand us! So disgraceful! We must find a solution.” In the village, people emphasized family reputation and regarded “bugler” as shame. Therefore, they were mad at Sanjay after hearing Vasin’s words and some of them even shouted “Kill him!” or “Bury him!”. The neighbor auntie heard the news and told Damayanti. Sanjay ran away immediately.
Damayanti hadn’t heard from Sanjay over 7 years since then. She lived with their two children. The elderly one was 15 years old, working as a cowherd. Other children often cursed at him.
One year after Sanjay left, Japanese invaded the village. Some people persuaded Damayanti, “Why not marry others? It’s meaningless to waste your life for a bad guy. There are a lot of good men in the world.”
Damayanti refused and said, “You don’t know the real situation. Sanjay isn’t bad.”
Hearing Sanjay’s story, village cadre and director went to talk with him. The director said, “We have punished Vasin and returned all the things he forcibly occupied. You are victim so we decide to give you land and you can feed on it. Do you agree?” Sanjay yelled, “I don’t care about that. What I need is a public apology from Vasin! It’s unfair to be misun- derstood for so many years.” Village cadre and director promised him.
At night, villagers gathered to have a meeting, and Sanjay also partic- ipated. The village director pointed out the aim of the meeting but some people were unwilling to have any contact with Sanjay. No matter what others feel, Sanjay said, “I have been back for half a month, but no one wants to connect with me because you thought me as a bad guy. Howev- er, tonight, I want to debate about what I have done with the honorable family member–Vasin, and I hope you serve as the judge. Don’t worry. It’s a new society.” Then he turned to Vasin, “Mr. Vista, you have to spare more energy and time on jerk like me. Our debt is clear: I owed you 30 yuan and around 60 kilograms rice. You took 3 cottages, 4 mu land from me and I worked for you 5 years without wages. I don’t want to bother about that now. I just want you to judge whether I am a good man or not!”
Looking around without a word for a while, Vasin said, “If you have resentful feelings towards me, you can just tell directly. I have compen- sated all I got illegally and you are the last one. You can't bully me. I still have a big shop!”
Fugue said, “I am not here to bully you, Mr.Vista. I don’t want com- pensation. I just need you to tell everyone I am not a jerk! I did nothing bad until I was 18 years old.” Others echoed Sanjay “Yes. Tell the truth.” Sanjay continued, “Later, I started to gamble, steal and became a jerk eventually. I have done many wrong things and I don’t blame anyone. I have reflected on my mistakes. I am not a good people according to your principle. You want me to work for you and to occupy my land. At the
end of each year, my wages and harvest from the land are all used to pay back interests, leaving no food for my family. It’s a vicious circle! Why do I gamble? Why do I steal things? Why do I become a jerk? It’s because I’m hungry and I have no food. In order to hold my mother’s funeral, I bought a coffin and other things from your shop and I’m afraid I can’t pay back so I work for you for 5 years. Even so, I lost my land finally so had no harvest. It has been 6 years since I caught bad habits. During the period, I have been abused, beaten, crying and starving numerous times. Villagers still call me jerk this year and curse my son. It’s all because of you! To prevent from being punished, I went to Liao county in which I still gamble and steal to feed myself. Later, Japanese came so no one had time to tease me. Then I was educated by new government, and I went to till new land in the mountain. Since then, I had my own land, cottage and food again, but I still did not dare to come back to look after my wife and children. Over the past 7 years outside, I bought a cow, accumulated rice and other food there. I have had been aimed to take over my fam- ily and have no plan to get even with you. However, people in the vil- lage were unwilling to talk to me, maybe being afraid of being stolen or thinking me as jerk. I don’t want to leave under a notorious cap. Mr.Vista, please tell everyone whether I am a jerk or not! Who should be responsi- ble for all my difficulties?”